Been a long time since my last blog. Tonight, I have so many thoughts in my mind that I think I look emo.
Therefore, here I am to record down all my thoughts and maybe one day when I review this blog, I may realize I achieve something or miss out something.
Thoughts on Angie: Felt blessed that she is a smart and cute baby. Maybe it is God's will that nobody is perfect. She is born smart and behaved and thus have some defect in her eye. Looking at her smiling with her spectacles, make me proud that she is so cute even with specs. However, as I type these down, I felt tears in the corner of my eye. Why? I recalled just now, when we were in IKEA, people look at Angie with a puzzled look. I told myself not to be bothered, but I subconsciously turn Angie around them. I realized I felt hurt when people look at her with the pitiful look in their eye. I think I will feel better if people praise that she look cute with her specs. Hai...think I will need some time to adjust to those puzzled stares.
Thoughts on Malaysia: Should I drive into JB on Wednesday public holiday or wait till weekend when petrol need refill? Which checkpoint should I go to? Should I go shopping and pump petrol or solely go in for petrol? Which shopping center to go? Who should I ask along? So many question marks in my mind. Guess will need Dear to decide for me.
Thoughts on self improvement: Hai..sometime I will set target and have a fix timing in my mind about what I should read or do in that hour. Be it reading up on Forex trading, stocks trading or updating of my account balance. However, Angie will always be my main focus and every time when the hour is up for serious business, either I will be slacking some where or I will be shopping online for Angie's stuff or my stuff. Every time I think back on the time I wasted, I will ask myself "How am I going to achieve my goal on quitting my job in 2 years time (wrapped up 10 years working experience) if I remain this way?" This question comes on and off but till now, no action have yet been taken. Hopefully after this blog, there will be some improvement.
Thoughts on steamboat business: This idea had always been in my mind. I wanted to start it but not sure how to go about it. Thought of renting a shop to start it but this will require some capital which I am lacking of. Thought of setting it online first so that no capital is required but not sure how to make the website and did not go look for sources and contacts. Some time I tell myself, I will have to overcome the obstacles (mind and reality) and I must be BIGGER than my problems! I CAN DO IT!
Thought of family: Recently, I organizing a lunch buffet at Cafebiz with my family and aunties. Though it cost $33 per person, I planned to treat Dear for it since he will treat me The Line for Anniversary. However, what I am worried now is, will I have to pay for my parents and grandma on that day? That will be another extra expenses. Though I don't mind paying for them, but seems like I will be spending too much for this month! I will have to dig my saving again! People may think I deserve it and I should not grumble since I am the one who organize. BUT WAIT! I just wanted some quality time and memories with them! Being married does not make me an outsider! It's through these events where all of us can gather and joke together. Beside, the elders did not went for hotel buffet before so what's wrong with bringing them? Think only people with strong family ties will understand what I am saying.
Hello Sis!
ReplyDeleteTo be frank, no one wants Angie to be like this. No matter what is the outcome, she is my niece. The naught and waste my time little girl who I need to entertain! And of course, sweet memories do come. I believe no matter what, we believe she is fine that it. As what you said, no one is perfect. She is just extraordinary that people just not use to it. For us, we seem it, feel it, touched it! Others are just envy about us! Be proud that Angie had given you the strength! Be grateful for what she is for giving you the opportunity to be her mother.
For your Malaysia trip, one question to ask you. Is it worth to do it? Time Vs Money. I believe you might have considered about this. So I should not say much. Going over just to pump petrol, what is the purpose?
Self improvement! Great! U now understands how I feel when I am at home already!?
Being enterprises is good! Please layout your plans and shall discuss after I had pass my test and start earning.
For buffet, you make the choice. You start off, end it well. So your objectives is to bond, then I wouldn’t agree you for holding back to spend your saving. After which, you need to be control your saving so as to compensate your losses for previous month.
To summaries, I might not be a good helper or person to provide you with these. I do not have the right. This is just what I feel and how I will manage on your situation. I might not be you. But I believe there will be somehow a similar point. 天無絕人之路...